As I did last year, I will attempt to write a blogpost a day for the 12 days of Christmas; except this time I will pick a new topic each day. This is the blogpost for the fifth day of Christmas 20/21.
The subject for today is suggested by Tobias Geyer 🙂
Gratefulness is amazing and hard. It is easy to fall into the trap of not appreciating what we have, but instead looking at what is missing.
That does not mean that we should never look at what is missing. I do believe in finding the silverlining in things and looking at what is good. I also believe that we need to look at problems and challenges and loss to be able to handle it.
It rubs me the wrong way when organisations go “we don’t have problems, we have challenges” or other ways of not being allowed to bring up problems.
I have seen companies with a pretty value on a wall on “Being positive” and then weaponising that when people bring up things. Hitting them on the head with a big positive attitude stick so that they fit in and the value remains. There is nothing wrong with the value itself, just the implementation of it. I felt it myself a few weeks ago, when I brought up a concern and was told “Why can’t you just look at what we CAN do instead?” in an aggresive, loud, and patronising voice.
That is the wrong kind of “positivity” – the toxic kind.
What I am talking about is being aware of the world as it is – or as the best interpretation of that – and still find the good things about it. Like my dear friend drunkcod says “Things become better when we accept them as they
are. Not as we want them to be.” (This does not mean “accept” as in “we can’t change it”, but “accept” as in “see them for what they are at this moment and not some wishful dream”)
And it isn’t always easy. I took the challenge in November of #30daysofgratitude and it was tough some days; I even had to miss one day because I could not find a single thing to be grateful for. And that day one of my friend wrote on their gratitude on my behalf – that is how lucky I am 🙂
It was really good for me to reflect every day and find things to be grateful for, because it reminded me that I do have a lot of good things. I may not meet my friends because of corona, but I have loads who stay in touch online. I may not be able to speak at conferences and meet people, but I have online conferences giving me a chance to speak about things that still help people. Like how hard it can be for mental health and psychological safety during corona – and the good things at well. I was even mentioned in Fortune Magazine online with that due to lovely serendepity (a writer working on an article and researching, who happened to follow someone tweeting from the conference – the world is small).
I managed to find 29 things to be grateful and that made me feel better. and it made me be more aware on the good things I do have in life. It also helps me find the energy to work on the things that do no work.
What are you grateful for?
How can that help you with the other things in life?
Blogpost for the first day of Christmas 20/21: Time for reflection
Blogpost for the second day of Christmas 20/21: Unicorns
Blogpost for the third day of Christmas 20/21: Raining again
Blogpost for the fourth day of Christmas 20/21: Being or doing
Blogpost for the sixth day of Christmas 20/21: Having people in my space
Blogpost for the seventh day of Christmas 20/21: Family
Blogpost for the eight day of Christmas 20/21: Uninspiration
Blogpost for the ninth day of Christmas 20/21: Fear (and courage?)
Blogpost for the tenth day of Christmas 20/21: Jumping in puddles
Blogpost for the eleventh day of Christmas 20/21: The choice is yours
Blogpost for the twelfth day of Christmas 20/21: Anticipation